the freedom sandwich

And then sometimes - the non-nightshade eating, refined carb-o-phobe vegan NEEDS a turkey sandwich. With cheese. And sun-dried tomatoes. On a bagel. With a coke. I had such an attack the other night - and have been out of control since.
It. Feels. Awesome.

I have dedicated so much time to health and healing and learning and cleansing and yoga and eating greens and brown rice and juicing and I finally hit the proverbial wall. My health has passed the point of balance and is sweeping into the territory of doing what is "good" and "correct" and "perfect" - which inevitably for me is also followed by extreme guilt, anxiety and panic.

This is not to say that I don't believe in eating a mostly vegetarian, organic, whole foods based diet. Aside from the fact that I personally feel better eating clean beautiful food, there is too much evidence out there which points to the fact that our Standard American Diet is making us sick. If you haven't read Fast Food Nation, The China Study, Food and Healing, or seen Food Inc., check them out. The point here is not meat vs. vegan, processed vs. whole or even Secret vs. baking soda - let's be clear.

The point here, is freedom.

The first thing that came into my mind during my turkey sandwich extravaganza (OK, maybe second as the first was mostly just "HELL YES") was something I read in Food and Healing by Annemaire Colbin. On page 33, she describes 7 universal laws of how things work. Here are 3:

Everything changes: Nothing remains the static. Energy moves constantly, within and among systems. Thus, the diet that heals us must change as we change.

Everything has an opposite: Everything has a front and a back. Opposites are complementary, connected like two ends of a stick or two sides of a coin, and separated by degrees. Opposites may change into one another, and often do, either gradually or suddenly.

Energy moves in a pendulum swing, between opposites: All motion is the result of expansion and contraction, to and fro, in rhythmic alternation. When the swing arrives at its extreme position, it reverses direction and heads the opposite way. Day turns into night, winter into summer, the in-breath into the out-breath.

So I feel that A) I can't be surprised after months of kale that I would find myself in a almost desperate state for turkey, B) the key to any real health, healing or balance is to learn to listen to what it is we really need - it's a constantly changing ever-evolving living and breathing dance, and C) the most important thing is my right to exercise the freedom to choose for myself, and only for myself, what is right for me at any given time. Not because Macrobiotics say I shouldn't eat spinach, the colonic guy says I should drink juice for breakfast, or my dear father thinks I'm an idiot cause I don't eat steak.

We can only find real balance in the freedom, and there is soooo much freedom in balance.

Off in search of rainbow sprinkles...